Thursday, 8 October 2009

Lets Watch Guin Saga: Part 15

*Whipping noises*

Mongol Captain: Haha! Now you will tell us how to use that teleporter you guys have! You clearly have one! We even used vague and unreliable information to work it out!

Naris: Whipping? Seriously you guys? Have you any idea of the kinda chicks I have dated? This is second date material.

White Knight: What the hell! Naris is not a prisoner! He's an honoured guest! Stop torturing him!

Mongol Captain: Ooohhh....

White Knight: Don't worry Prince Naris, we'll take you to a much nicer room.

Naris: Hey, why are we stopping? I didn't even say the safety word yet?

Astreas: Oh no... Amn is being taken away to get married... When she should be marrying me... I am sad...

Astreas: Wait, I have a cunning plan... I will go to Parros and stop the wedding! Brilliant!

Guy: I am so HOT.

Girl: OMG! You are so HOT!

Guy: Ha! I would totally do you and cheat on my wife, if you weren't already my wife.

Old guy: What the hell guys? Your supposed to be talking about invading Mongol so we can help out Parros!

Guy: Oh, is that what we were doing? I thought this scene was purely to show everyone how hot I am?

Girl: OMG! You are so HOT!

Meanwhile the characters we care about are off to a sea port to get to one of their allied nations.

Remus: *Sigh* Rinda has everyone looking out for her... She even has a pet monkey... Why don't I have anything?

Kar Mol: Yooouuuu guuuuyyyyssss

Remus: Holy crap! My intense emoing has given me super powers!

Remus: Whoa, that was an odd vision... Me and my sister seem like complete opposites... Shes like the Light... and if shes the Light then I am....

Once again Istavan insults the monkeys, unfortunately since the giants are now friends with the monkeys, they take a certain offence at his comments.

Istavan: Oh shit! No! I didn't mean it!

Naris: Ohh... It hurts to sit down... Ahhh... But I kinda like it...

White Knight: Hey there! We're gonna have a party... thought you might want to come!

Naris:... Are you gonna try and marry me to your princess?

White Knight: Wh... No, of course not! Wh-why would you think that?

Naris: Look, I'm like the smartest person in this anime, its not hard to work out.

White Knight: Urrr... Could you pretend you didn't know?

Naris: *Sigh* Fine.

Bard: Hey there! You look crazy and willing to throw your money away, want to hear a song from a distant land?

Astreas: Wait, have you ever been to Parros?

Bard: Of course!

Astreas: .... Hmmm... could you come to my room?

Bard: Urr... Ok.

Astreas: I'm sorry if this seems a bit awkward.

Bard: Not at all! I've done this before.

Astreas: Ok... so what do you know about Prince Naris?

Bard: Hmm... Lets see... I think I've got a picture of him here...

Astreas: Oh? Let me see.

*Poof, Astreas is knocked out*

Bard: Haha! I've told you I've done this before... By the way, you wouldn't know it but I'm actually Naris's half brother... Now I'll use you in one of our political plots... Right after I ruin that ass. Reverse date rape bitch.

*Later at the masquerade party*

Naris: *Phew, I'm really glad I didn't throw away my S&M suit*

Naris: Ok, so this is how its gonna go down, their going to try and hook me up with their princess and I need you as my cockblock.

Other Guy: Any time sir.

Amn: I can't believe I'm doing this... I should be out there-

Naris: Hey.

Amn: HOLY SHIT! He's gorgeous!

Amn: Ur.... Urrr... I gotta go... and... masturbate- I mean rest!.... I'm tired!

Naris:... Ok, change of plan, I can totally mess with this bitch.

Rinda: Hey... Remus? I haven't heard you complain for like the whole episode? Are you alright?

Remus:... I'm fine... Look, you guys... I'm just gonna go to bed.

Guin: Can you guys believe I've had like only six lines of dialogue in this episode?

That night Remus has a strange dream.

Remus: Its so odd... But I feel like I have a destiny... One separate from the entire plot of this show... Yes... If Rinda is the Light... Then I will be....

Remus: The Darkness! Hahaha! Destiny! Prepare to become my bitch!

(Holy shit you guys! What's gonna happen next time?!)

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