Friday, 21 August 2009

Hype: Anime Fall 2009

Hurray! Something to actually discuss and inform you about! The season of anime has been announced giving us new gems to look forward to. But James, didn’t you cover the last season not too long ago? Your right reader but this is the thing about the world of anime, it moves very fast and if you actually want to see the good ones then you’ve got to keep with it pretty constantly.

Well hopefully this new season will be better than the last one right? Japan would never just spill out the same old crap again would they?

.....

Lets... Let’s just look at a few samples shall we?

Armed Librarians, Book of Bantorra




Honestly Japan are you just throwing ideas into a hat in a vain attempt to make something ‘original’? I mean this thing doesn’t have anything to do with literature, books are condensed soul’s or something stupid. A story about a normal man trying to save his library from crazy book burners would have been far more interesting... and it’s simple Japan! It doesn’t need magic powers at all!

Crazy I know!

Darker Than Black (season 2)




Now actually I really like Darker than Black, it’s got a pretty crazy surreal edge to it but I think it works rather well. Without saying too much the story is basically about these people with special powers called contractors, their called this because after using their powers they are overcome with the compulsion to do some small menial task... and that actually gives the powers and the characters a nice depth and makes them more interesting than they would be normally. My favourite so far is the man who could control gravity (Very powerful guy) but he had to break his fingers after using his powers... pretty cool.

If you’re looking into getting into anime and want to start on a little weird one then I highly recommend looking up the first season of Darker Than Black.



Romance of the Three Kingdoms




If you do not know the story of the three kingdoms then where the hell have you been exactly? Go away! Look it up! Then you can come back.

Do you do it? If you didn’t I’ll get Ma Chao to kill you...

Anyway, this seems like a long one that could be good... but... I’ve basically ruined it for you by making you look it up. This sort of thing falls into the batman category:
“That’s nice, but I already know how it ends”







Everyone dies!





The Scared Blacksmith


.... Reader... There is something we need to talk about. Take a look at that picture. Take a good look. What is wrong with it?

Those of you who said crazy hair colours, good try, A for effort. Those of you who said crazy outfits, your very close. Finally those who said “Retarded armour” You are correct.

If anyone dares ask what is wrong with the armour I will kill you. I will quite literally find out where you live and murder you. Everything is wrong with it! World! Look! The medieval was sexist! Stop trying to ignore that, it happened. There are two reasons armour was not made like that.

Number One! Women did not fight... ever! We all know why, and I don’t care if you call me sexist... The world is unfair, get over it.

Number Two! Because it would be f***ing retarded! Do you even know how armour works? Yes it’s a barrier to protect your weak flesh but there’s a very curial bit you’re forgetting. Deflection! Do you know why the breast plate is rounded? So that force of the flow can be deflected away from you! One blow to her middle and she’s dead. That’s not a joke or exaggeration , that armour is actually going to help her die. Well look at that your ribcage was shattered into your organs but at least you look good, right? RIGHT?!

I know it’s just a stupid anime but this has been going on for ages and it’s stupid! In order for fantasy worlds to grip the audience they need to be covered in a layer of reality to make it believable. When you do something stupid like this it breaks the immersion completely! GRRAA JAMES SMASH!



Fairy Tale


I actually read the manga of this and I’d say it falls nicely next to One Piece in just being simple straight forward fun. It’s all about the mage guild fairy tale and their wacky and heart warming adventures. The magic system makes little to no sense to me but I forgive it cause the fights are cool and the powers are neat. I’d say this one’s a solid bet.

One thing, the hair colours are gonna take some getting used to, since the manga is in black and white the hair colours seem normal... but in actual fact their way out there and crazy.

Kampfer

Stay the hell away from this reader! I cannot express to you how dangerous getting into one of these kinds of anime is. If you let this kind of genre into you that’s it... you have become a true anime fan, here’s your cat ears and panty shot album.

Now I have watched anime like this before... It was like some... twisted nightmare where everything was weird... and a voice in your ear tells you it’s alright. Do not listen reader, that is the voice of the broken and you don’t want anything to do with them. To give you an idea why this is bad for you, here is the synopsis, unedited just for you:
“Natsuru Seno, an ordinary high school boy, suddenly wakes up one morning to find he is a girl, as explained by a disembowelled plush tiger. Natsuru discovers that has he, or she, has been chosen to participate in Kampfer battles with other girls.”

.......

Shin Koihime Musou






Her family dies, she is sad, vows revenge against all bandits and villains, gains friends. Yes... Because that sounds f***ing riveting. What she gonna do? Bat her eyelids menacingly at them?

I can’t help but feel the same question will pop up in this again and again

“Haha! I am evil”
“Ur... Why?”
“Because... I am evil! Haha! Hate and despise me!”

That answer only works if your Mumm-Ra.

Hell maybe I should watch it just so I can rip the piss. I'm going to use my powers to spread hate and vengence instead of using them to fix the socail problems that lead to villinay! Teehee! Also I love stuffing melons into my shirt! Yay for melons!


Jungle Emepror Leo


The hell?


Stitch 2




The f***?


Battle Spirits





God damn it! Why is there always a card game one! WHY!



Heres the full list http://img139.imageshack.us/img139/1548/fall2009anime.jpg

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